Gummer Beaudine - Let's Go Honky Tonkin'

 We got the lowdown about Gummer Beaudine from our main man, Big Marv. They met so she could get permission from him to do a version of Marv's song Stanky Thang. He gave her the okay, but talked her into putting the project on hold, as he thought she'd do better with an original song. So Marv wrote the music for Let's Go Honky Tonkin' while she wrote most of the lyrics. 

Her first name is really Patty. She got the Gummer moniker from an incident in her earlier life. Seems she got hit square in the mouth with a shovel! Her boyfriend at the time was a big drinker, get lit up and wail on her, and one night he started digging a big hole in the back yard, and when she went out to see why he was doing it, he took the shovel and hit her on the head and across her face with it! She vaguely remember that he said he was digging her grave! He got as far as rolling her unconscious body into the hole and started throwing dirt on top of her when a neighbor came over to see what the ruckus was about. The neighbor happened to be a weight lifter, and subdued her boyfriend handily, and called the police. He was charged with attempted murder, convicted, and sits in jail. Seems he had a long list of assault cases on top of this one, so he's not getting out real soon, if ever. Patty spent a long time in the hospital, went through facial reconstruction surgery multiple times as well as losing all of her teeth. She had to go without any denture for a while until her jaw healed, so her friends at the bar gave her the name. She adopted it, and goes by it in her life without any problem.

Marv told us she was a pretty tough customer! He had to use all his powers of persuasion to get her to wait on using his song. He felt that after her first song, Pocket Rocket, it'd be good if she recorded something a little different. Ends up it turned out to be not that different, as it's her style to have a rough house sound.  She told him she started out playing in bars that would have chicken wire strung up between the audience and the band for safety! She said beer bottles, ashtrays, shoes, you name it would be thrown at the stage if the crowd didn't like the music! 

 Been a hard week at work 

Just ‘bout up an’ quit 

But dammit, I need the money 

Tonight I don’t give a shit!

 

 Let’s go honky tonkin’ dammit! 

Drank some bare, eat some fries

 Feel like havin’ some fun 

Or I’m just gonna up and die! 

 

Don’t be no asshole when we go 

I might do some dancin’ with ‘nother 

 Don’t mean I wanna fuck him 

So don’t git mad, don’t bother!

 

 Let’s go honky tonkin’ dammit! 

Drank some whisky, swat some flies 

Feel like havin’ some fun 

Or I’m just gonna up and die! 

 

 Wanna hear some country western 

But some real good beat to the song

 Don't wanna hear no rap or any that crap 

'Course throw in some honky tonk! 

 

Let’s go honky tonkin’ dammit! 

Drank some terquila, tell some lies 

Feel like havin’ some fun 

Or I’m just gonna up and die! 

 

 We git a little lit by the time they close 

We can head on out to my place 

Do a li'l bit horizontal mambo 

Asses scoot all over the place 

 

Let’s sleep late tomorry 

Hair of the dog that bit us, bit a gin 

Take a shower, fuck a bit 

Then go do it all over again!