Percy McCoy continues in an experiential time in his life, this time being influenced by his friends to Bungee jump off of a high bridge that spans a gorge. There's not a single person at Big And Tall Records that has Bungee jumped, has an appointment to Bungee jump, or even has had the remotest thought of Bungee jumping!
The modern 'sport' comes from a rite of passage for the natives of Pentecost Island in the country of Vanuatu. It's called Land Diving, and young men leap from high towers with vines tied around their ankles. They intentionally hit the ground, unlike the modern sport, and have made the correct calculations as to not make the contact lethal (however thy figure THAT!) Leave it to human beings, no matter what age of history or area of the world, there will always be some that devise things for people (especially men) to show their courage, or maybe just to get an adrenaline high.
Percy came through physically unharmed, although he had an issue with...um...his clothing. Why he gets so wrapped up in taking suggestions and dares from his friends is beyond us!
My buddies talked me into tryin' it.
My heart wasn't in it, wasn't buyin' it.
But with nothin' else to do, I figgered why not?
But man, I 'bout got all the snot
and other stuff scared outa me!
Jest call me a goddam chump!
Really scared shit less of height,
Bastards got me to bungee jump!
'Bout fainted at the damned sight!
All of them done it first before I did.
My ego stopped me from refusin'.
So I was next and I went and hid,
But they found me for the abusin'.
Jest call me a goddam fool!
Ass holes got me to bungee jump!
Seemed 'bout bein' really cruel.
Seat a my pants was a sticky lump!
They tied all the ropes and shit on me.
Hope they knowed what they was doin'.
I was payin' good money, wasn't free,
To risk all the harm and bruisin'!
Jest call me a bloomin' idiot!
Jerks got me to bungee jump!
Wait! I think I gotta go shit!
Wasn't like jumpin' off a tree stump!
The harness was all buckled up,
They put a helmet on my head.
Why they did I was real stumped,
That's gonna stop me from bein' dead?
Goddam, this is fucked up!
Bitches got me to bungee jump!
Hope I got my health insurance paid up!
Now it was time to take the jump!
We was on a high long bridge,
A deep gorge it was above,
They told me to just fall off the ledge,
But my buddies done give me a shove!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
It was a really long time to get down.
Dirty fucks got me to bungee jump!
My stomach didn't go with me down,
Then I hit the end of the rope!
It snapped my ass back up in the air,
As high as the ledge I got throwed off.
My arms were a flyin' like my hair,
I bounced and bounced and stayed aloft!
Didn't find nothin' thrillin' 'bout it!
My BUDDIES got me to bungee jump.
What's thrillin' 'bout jeans full a shit!
I finally quit pumpin'.
They reeled my ass back up top,
Like a dead fish on a fish pole,
I landed on the ledge with a plop,
Onto my back I was rolled.
My buds all crowded 'round my corpse,
The bastards that talked me into the jump,
They tol' me you had real fun of course!
Tried to get up, but fell on my rump.
So the moral of this tale my friends,
Be careful who ya have for yer blokes
Don't let anyone talk ya into these things,
Or yer balls may end up in yer throat!
OH, I AIN'T GETTIN' MAD! I'M GETTIN' EVEN!
WHICH ONE OF YOU ASS HOLES
PAYIN' MY LAUNDRY BILL!
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