Once we here at Big And Tall Records aren't surprised by what we get from our artists, we get a song like this one! We are still in the dark about who this Chuck Wagon Calhoun character is, but his songs are a hoot. Now, he's teamed up with our Mariachi artists Un Grupo de Mexicali in this bit of typical Calhoun tall tale telling. And that's all we know. Un Grupo gave us no clue, and of course Calhoun's lips are sealed about who he is. Un Grupo obviously struck up a good relationship with Calhoun as their part in this song is up to their usually high standards. But we don't know if Chuck Wagon went to Mexico, as Un Grupo have vowed to stay out of the U.S. due to the current political climate, or if Un Grupo were in the states unbeknownst. In any case, the song is up to both the artists standards!
HOLA!
This here's Chuck Wagon Calhoun!
Got a story to tell ye 'bout when I had to
Leave the great state of California
In a....well....right big hurry....
And what happened when I went south to
TIJUANER, MEXICO!
YEE HAW! YA'LL!
I rode like hell and made it,
Way down south of the border
And escape some situations
That were a right big disorder
Rode in the town of Tijuaner and met
Me some real live bandeeters...
And bought them tequiler in the canteener,
That's where I seen the senioriter...
She were dancin', playin' them clackity clack bits!
Dress ruffly, low cut and a showin' her tits!
Spinnin' and a clackin', with the hombres yakkin'
Dress raisin', showin' her under paints gave me fits!
One a them thar bandeeters, wearin' a bandelaro,
All raggedly dressed, an' wearin' a great big sombrero...
Noticed me makin' googly eyes and said to me "Hey Meester!"
Jew like what jew see, pay me, jew can have my seester!"...
She kept dancin' , clickin' them clackity clack bits
Dress ruffly, low cut and a showin' her tits!
Spinnin' and a winkin' all the hombres drinkin'...
Dress raised higher , drivin' me out ma wits!
I fer shore fancied her, so I asked him how much it cost?
He said, "I like you, only 22 pesos and you be boss!
Her name is Sally, take her to back alley
Best young woman you ever come across!
She kept on dancin' , I gave him the money
He brought her back , she were callin' me honey
Her brother yelled and swore, she led me out the door
And the others began to laugh...what were so funny?
Went out to the alley and she started kissin' on me
She were firm and young, and really a might pretty!
I was unawares, but then started seein' stars!
And then they was nothing else left to see...
Don't know how long it t'wer, I laid out in the sand
Face next to a cow turd, cactus near to hand
Ma head full of bumps, ma skin covered in lumps
Staggered to ma feet, couldn't hardly stand
Finally some federales came ridin' out to help me,
Were 'bout daid, pain ma haid, eyes all red,
Helped me on a horse, gave me food and water
Tol' me "No vuelvas Americano PENDEJO!"
Took me a long time to git healed from that.
I vowed I'd swear off women!
Damn, all ma troubles seem to happen
When I git hooked up with one of 'em!
And I really did. ..Swear off 'em...
FER ' BOUT 2 DAYS!
HAHAHA!
This here's Chuck Wagon Calhoun!
Got a story to tell ye 'bout when I had to
Leave the great state of California
In a....well....right big hurry....
And what happened when I went south to
TIJUANER, MEXICO!
YEE HAW! YA'LL!
I rode like hell and made it,
Way down south of the border
And escape some situations
That were a right big disorder
Rode in the town of Tijuaner and met
Me some real live bandeeters...
And bought them tequiler in the canteener,
That's where I seen the senioriter...
She were dancin', playin' them clackity clack bits!
Dress ruffly, low cut and a showin' her tits!
Spinnin' and a clackin', with the hombres yakkin'
Dress raisin', showin' her under paints gave me fits!
One a them thar bandeeters, wearin' a bandelaro,
All raggedly dressed, an' wearin' a great big sombrero...
Noticed me makin' googly eyes and said to me "Hey Meester!"
Jew like what jew see, pay me, jew can have my seester!"...
She kept dancin' , clickin' them clackity clack bits
Dress ruffly, low cut and a showin' her tits!
Spinnin' and a winkin' all the hombres drinkin'...
Dress raised higher , drivin' me out ma wits!
I fer shore fancied her, so I asked him how much it cost?
He said, "I like you, only 22 pesos and you be boss!
Her name is Sally, take her to back alley
Best young woman you ever come across!
She kept on dancin' , I gave him the money
He brought her back , she were callin' me honey
Her brother yelled and swore, she led me out the door
And the others began to laugh...what were so funny?
Went out to the alley and she started kissin' on me
She were firm and young, and really a might pretty!
I was unawares, but then started seein' stars!
And then they was nothing else left to see...
Don't know how long it t'wer, I laid out in the sand
Face next to a cow turd, cactus near to hand
Ma head full of bumps, ma skin covered in lumps
Staggered to ma feet, couldn't hardly stand
Finally some federales came ridin' out to help me,
Were 'bout daid, pain ma haid, eyes all red,
Helped me on a horse, gave me food and water
Tol' me "No vuelvas Americano PENDEJO!"
Took me a long time to git healed from that.
I vowed I'd swear off women!
Damn, all ma troubles seem to happen
When I git hooked up with one of 'em!
And I really did. ..Swear off 'em...
FER ' BOUT 2 DAYS!
HAHAHA!
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